Daisy’s Battle Against Addiction
Time and time again, we experience people struggling with addiction and really trying to shake off the urges. For some it’s an easy transition process, but for many it’s a very long journey, and quite a few of those people have very unique circumstances which make them feel alone. To those people many people are in the same process. We wanted to Daisy’s struggle. She has been battling addiction for years, and is continuing today.
Daisy’s Story – Battling Addiction
“My addiction like many others did not happen overnight. It started when I was in college, around 18 years old and living away from home for the first time. I moved to San Diego to attend SDSU – which happens to have been one of the top colleges for partying at the time. The freedom I had made me go overboard with drinking. In fact the first week of school I went to a different party every night with my roommate and new friends. I had my first blackout during this time. However, this did not concern me, for I knew nothing about alcoholism nor did I think for a second that I might be one.
I continued to drink heavily until I was 22 and still in college. I took a break from school, mainly because my parents refused to pay for it anymore, and went backpacking through Southeast Asia with a friend thinking that this would curb my cravings for alcohol. I was wrong. The other backpackers were into partying just as much as I was. Looking back I wish I had not gotten drunk every night I was there, it would have been a much better experience for me.
I returned to the states and got my first DUI. The judge ordered me to get help so I returned home and went to my first residential program. I was young and in denial and I didn’t listen to one thing during my 28 day stay there. I stayed sober for a day or two after getting out but once I got my own apartment I started drinking again. I would say this is when I became a full blown alcoholic. I knew I was one yet I still did not want to accept the fact.
This went on for years, however, I was a functioning alcoholic and was able to show up for work each day. I moved to Texas and got a job I loved. It was at this point that I stopped drinking as much because of my job and often worked late so there was no time to drink. After five years in Texas I moved back to home to be closer to my family. I was still drinking less at this point but after a few months I became extremely stressed out. I turned to the only thing I knew that would calm me down – alcohol.
I hated my new job and I looked for a different one on a daily basis and finally found one. I was fired after two days because the manager could smell alcohol on me. This is when things got worse. I got another DUI and went back into a treatment facility. This time I actually listened to what they had to say. I became educated on alcoholism and how it is seen as a disease by some. I read the book and followed the steps. When I returned home I stayed sober for around six months. Then I started drinking again for no reason other than boredom.
A few years went by with no change in my drinking habits. Then in October 2008 a man broke into my house and nearly beat me to death. I was unconscious for four days and when I awoke in a pool of dried blood I had missing teeth, my face was so bruised I was unrecognizable and I had bruises and cuts all over my body from being thrown into my glass coffee table. My mother took me to the hospital where I was told I had a concussion. I do not remember Thanksgiving or Christmas that year. I don’t even remember going to the hospital or filing a police report, which apparently I did because it was recorded and pictures of my injuries were taken. They never caught the man responsible. After this my drinking became the worst it had ever been.
After this happened, I would only leave my house during the day and only to buy alcohol in excess. I was so frightened that he would return (as he did not steal anything so I believe it was personal) that I did not leave my house at night for an entire year. I had severe panic attacks every night and was constantly checking the doors and windows to make sure they were locked. I barely slept unless the alcohol made me pass out.
I finally sought out help and returned to treatment for a third time. This time it was located by the beach – which relaxes me. I felt so much better that I ended up staying for 90 days. However, when I returned I had to attend my brother’s wedding. I was placed at the kids table and given soda to drink. I was constantly being watched by my family. My father even told the bartender not to serve me, I learned this after trying to get a drink. I left even before dinner was served and went home. I didn’t drink though, this time for nine months.
After an abusive relationship ended (I was living with him) my drinking escalated. In fact, I got so drunk so often that on a few different occasions I broke my arm, my tailbone and finger from falling down while drunk. I wish I could say that this made me stop but it did not. I tried to stop and had severe and horrific hallucinations that I was taken to the hospital.
After moving back into my house I drank more and more. I was codependent on my mother for everything. I was an alcoholic loser. My family stopped speaking to me. I was not allowed at any Holiday functions and I was told to leave the state. This was a wake-up call for me. I tried to stop and had severe and such horrific hallucinations that I was taken to the hospital. I got out of the hospital and declared no more drinking.
I quit for sixty days and then the Holidays came and I was depressed so I began to drink again. Not as heavily at first but then I was back to my old pattern. On January 3, 2016 I stopped drinking. I hope it lasts this time. I reached out to my old sponsor and am attending meetings and joined an online support group. I feel and look better and I am trying to have a positive mental attitude this time. I know it will take time to reconnect with my family but hopefully if I stay sober the relationships will heal. It’s not fun being an alcoholic and it is a daily struggle. Recovery is possible but it takes dedication and hard work. I have had to change almost everything I do now just to stay busy, the cravings have decreased and I am starting to see a brighter future.”
You Are Not Alone
She has been seeking the right support for a while. Seeking the right rehab that actually wants to help is key. Another thing that has an impact on recovery is the location and scenery. A more luxurious location, in a better area can be very calming. The most important part is seeking out a Rehab with its own Relapse Prevention Program or with a network of caring professionals that can aid in Relapse Prevention. Finding the right support group, and actively attending meetings will be detrimental in continued sobriety. Lastly, learning to control stress and not letting it control you will be a big help in the battle for continued sobriety.
Daisy’s struggle is one that hundreds of thousands of people have a variation of. Each and every person’s story should be heard and addressed with care and compassion. To everyone battling addiction, “You are NOT alone!”. Every last person deserves the proper help and support group. For those people we are here; Give us a call today, and let us help!